It was finally time for the party. The party was at our church, and just before friends began arriving, Picasso was supposed to put back a little bike he’d been riding. I was confident in our preparations, the cake arrived and looked amazing, we had dry ice on the tables - everything for a fun, science-themed party.

I had prepared for everything - everything - except how to manage this outburst. And then, it happened. My dear boy had a meltdown. Despite all our preparations and planning and his excitement for the party, the moment had come and he was hiding in a back room. I went to get him, thinking he was just finishing up putting the bike away. What I walked in on was, “I’m NEVER coming out and you CAN’T make me!”

These outbursts happen from time to time and I can usually help him get over the anxiety quickly. The difference, though, is that he is not usually the center of attention - usually it happens when it’s a party for a friend, or at church, and I can remove him from the situation. Today, though, was his moment to shine and he was screaming at me in the back room. I was scared - scared that he would get hurt; scared that he might not come out of the room; scared that he *would* come out of the room and continue screaming and possibly start destroying things; scared that we might have this party without him while he & I hung out in the back room.

I decided to give him some time and walked out of the room. A good friend, who really understands my guy, walked by. In a panic, I told her what was going on. She immediately prayed for us - for the party, for our guy, for his anxiety. I began to feel more peaceful but still wasn’t sure what would happen. Several different people tried to coax him out of the room, inviting him to open a gift, see his friends, come out and be on the outside edge of the room - all to no real avail. He would come out, scope out the room, and walk back in again. Finally it was time to light the candles. He didn’t care. I asked, “Who should I get to blow out the candles? And if you don’t come out, you’ll miss the dry ice bubbling up from inside the cake.”

He came out. He came over to the cake table, thought the dry ice in the cake was the coolest thing, and the rest of the party was a huge hit.

The science company arrived, did an amazing show, and finished with a rocket launch. The rocket launch was one of the most amazing things I’ve ever seen. The folks from the science show said they’ve never seen a rocket that launced that high, ever before. We launched it from the back of the parking lot at our church, it went up into the sky, over the church and onto the road in front of the church. Thankfully, it was retrieved and Picasso got to keep the rocket.

We finished with presents and I must say, he got some fun gifts - looking forward to some Nerf wars, outdoor summer fun, Lego & Bionicle creations, science experiments and great books to read!

Looking back, I’m glad we had a group come in to run the party - it was a distraction that worked well because it was a new group that no one had seen before, and the experiments were fun. I’m glad I had a friend make the cake because she did an excellent job and I wouldn’t have been able to create something so fun!

The best part of the day, for me, was having a party with people who understand our son’s needs and were willing to walk through this day with us. I know that everyone else would have had a great time, even if I had spent the morning in the back room with Picasso. But our friends and family were sympathetic & helpful. Most of all, though, I personally felt at ease saying, “We’re not doing ok right now.” That’s a big step - to have to be vulnerable in front of people - to have them see the tough side of whatever issues we’re dealing with. I didn’t feel uncomfortable or defeated to have to admit that this might be too much for the birthday boy. I was glad, and relieved, when he finally did come around, blew out his candles and had a blast!

Happy birthday, Picasso!